Virtual memory doesn't cost anything. I could have a process that maps a large file on my hard drive and this will be through the roof. I got the following error today:
Time: Sat Aug 11 21:59:45 2012 -0600
Account: mike
Resource: Virtual Memory Size
Exceeded: 1110 > 1000 (MB)
Executable: /usr/bin/kmix
Command Line: /usr/bin/kmix -session 10108152142da000133799057900000022270010_1344454058_238350
PID: 2675
Killed: No
However KDE system activity reports this PID as only using ~8 MB and the total private + shared memory is ~14 MB:
$ cat /proc/2675/status | grep VmRSS
VmRSS: 14704 kB
Should I really be worried if a process is eating up gigabytes of virtual memory? I would be much more concerned if that was resident memory. So my suggestion would be to either use resident memory instead of virtual memory, or provide an option for each. In the KDE system activity it even says about the virtual memory usage: "this number is almost meaningless".